... some English Jokes

Customer: Waiter, this steak tastes awful. Take it back to the chef.
Waiter: Sorry, sir, but the chef won’t eat it either.

- Why are policeman strong?
- Because they hold up the traffic.

Husband: I think our son got his intelligence from me, don’t’ you?
Wife: yes, I think so. I’ve still got mine.

Waiter: How would you like to have your egg cooked sir?
Customer: Is there any difference in the price?
Waiter: No, sir.
Customer: Then I’ll have my egg cooked with ham, potatoes and sausages

He is such a careful driver that he always looks booth ways before hitting something.

Judge: You’ve been found guilty of not stopping at a red traffic light when you should've done. What do you have to say for yourself?
Accused: But I often stop at green traffic light when I don’t have to!